Saturday, September 29, 2012

Week 6, 1-5 October. Lessons.


English 1301

Monday P.M.

Tuesday and Thursday A.M.

Angryverbs.blogspot.com


Week of 1- 5 October 2012

 

Week 6 – Conclude PERSUASIVE WRITING, continue “The Seafarer” as a prelude to EXPOSITIVE WRITING, return DESCRIPTIVE ESSAYS

 

1.   Class begins when you enter the room; put away the plastic electrical toys that light up and make noises.  Open your journal and begin writing, work on your current assignment, update your notebook, or read the assigned pages in your textbook, but do not idle.

2.   Each class begins with journal writing.  Follow the prompt on the board.  Talk with each other.  Share knowledge.

3.   A typed, complete final draft of your two persuasive mini-essays in MLA format will be submitted as your name is called for roll on your first meeting of the week.  Two weeks are more than enough time for an effort requiring perhaps two hours; no late papers will be accepted.  An absence is no excuse; the assignment was posted on angryverbs.blogspot.com and on BlackBoard.  If you miss class, your essay is due at the next class with no penalty, but will not be accepted after that.

  1. This week we will continue reading “The Seafarer” in translation (it’s some 1,500 years old) as a prelude to an expository essay with internal citations and a short bibliography. Read Item 53, “MLA Documentation Style,” on pp. 517-519 in your Bedford,  8th edition.  Earlier editions may feature this on different pages.
  2. We are reading “Seafarer” not only as a source for practicing professional / academic writing but as a literary work in itself.  Some terms you will need to learn: four-beat line, rhythm, caesura, alliteration, elegy, exemplum, and kenning.  If you are not working at “Seafarer” and reading your long-term assignments outside of class, you’re not working.  Remember the college 3:1 rule.
  3. General debriefing of descriptive essays:

 

The combined scores of both classes:

 

90 – 99 – 14 students

80 - 89 -  15      

70 – 79 -    7      

0          -    9      

 

Roughly a third of all students earned an ‘A.’ These essays were a joy to read, and the writers should be proud of themselves for their hours and hours of meaningful effort.  Most of the other students wrote acceptable essays; if you didn’t, why not?

 

The zero papers are those which demonstrate a complete failure of the writer to read the instructions, listen to the teacher, read any of the handouts, read the material provided on angryverbs.blogspot.com or on BlackBoard, proofread, seek out the instructor for help, or seek out anyone else for a bit of advice.

 

When your papers are returned to you they are marked closely.  Read those marks and comments, and then work to understand – if you see “parallelism” next to a sequence, for instance, then look up “parallelism” in your text or other source to perceive the problem and then learn how to resolve it.  If you merely note your grade and do nothing to sort out the errors, you are not learning.  You will not pass this class through passivity.

 

Please read these general comments about the descriptive essays, and think:

 

Format – generally, the use of format was fair, but a number of you have not made the word-processing program of your choice obey you.  Do not turn in papers unless the formatting is perfect.

 

Tense change – most of you avoided this common error.

 

“I like to call…” – this pointless phrase was common.  Stop it.  Don’t write that you like to call your car Floyd; simply say that your car’s name is Floyd.

 

Memories / remember – you remember events in your life; you do not remember memories.

 

Beautiful / gorgeous / amazing sunrises – no.  There are no ugly sunrises, and very few amazing ones.  If you employ hyperbole and unnecessary adjectives in discussing ordinary occasions, what will you say when you really do encounter something beautiful / gorgeous / amazing? 

 

Monster – “monster” is applies only to a being that is capable of eating you. 

 

Topic sentence – avoid the annoying coyness of delaying the topic until the end of the first paragraph.  Respect your reader.

 

Noun-pronoun agreements – one person cannot be “they.” 

 

Hyperbole – understatement is always to be preferred. 

 

Exclamation marks - return the exclamation marks to junior high, where they belong, along with “extreme” and any not-cute variant spelling thereof, and the, like, totally rad “awesome.” 

 

Verb phrases – seldom employ verb phrases as subjects, i.e., “Being that my brother was a…”

 

Repetition – once you have written your essay, stop.  If your essay is too brief, you do not solve the problem by repeating what you have already written.

 

Overwriting / filler language / cliches’ / stilted language – “I walked along the gravel path” is good; “The amazing path along which the person known as me walked, skipped, jumped, and leaped happily to my special place along the path was layered in truckloads of rocks so that it wouldn’t wash away when the next hurricane came was a truly awesome and inspiring event that changed my life forever” isn’t.  Some of you compromised good ideas by writing as if you had cut up a thesaurus and dumped the words on the page.  Write short, plain, economical sentences that say what you want them to say; then add a very few adjectives and adverbs if they help.

 

Parallelism – items in sequence share a common grammatical structure and…oh, look it up.                                                                

 

Weak verbs – “have,” “has,” “is,” “go,” “went,” “gone,” “are,” and so on are sometimes exactly the right words to use, but not often.  I gave you a lesson on using strong verbs – were you texting under the table on the plastic electric box? 

 

Hallmark card language – Your family deserves better than sloppily sentimental language that would disgrace a greeting card – please, no more Ye Olde Good Ol’ Days When Life was Simple and Honest and Folks Never Met a Stranger and We Was Poor But We Didn’t Know it.  Please. 

 

K.I.S.S. – Keep It Short and Simple.  “Grandpa always wore those faded overalls that Grandma hated, and smelled like the hand-rolled cigarettes he smoked” says something.  “The wonderful, loving, marvelous gentle giant I liked to call my grandpa always clothed himself in old, faded, patched, grimy, blue overalls that Grandma hated, loathed, and despised, and was always and forever drenched in the smelly, stinky smell of the cigarettes that were rolled lovingly and skillfully by hand by him which I will remember forever and ever in my heart” is babbling.

 

Catalogues of adjectives – “I loved my rusty old Ford truck” is clear.  “I loved my cranky, squeaking, clanking, once-red, rusty, ancient, 1953 Ford truck” is babbling.

 

S.S. – sentence structure.  Write short, clear, simple sentences.  Make sure they say exactly what you want them to say.  Then stop.

 

Excessive detail – the reader doesn’t care that your desk has two drawers on the right-hand side, two drawers on the left-hand side, and a small drawer in the center.  That you have a desk is almost always enough information.

 

Queen-sized beds – this year’s flatscreen, I suppose.  “Queen-sized” is nothing more than advertising puffery, and says nothing.  That you have a bed is almost always enough information.

 

Paragraphing – generally very good.  Remember that a paragraph is predicated on one main idea. 

 

Just – whenever you employ the word “just,” you’re probably getting it wrong.  With “just” or with any other word, you must ask yourself why you are using this word in this place.

 

Would – as a helping verb: “We would go to town and then we would go for ice cream and then we would go home.”  Stop it.  Stop it now.  Use simple past tense.

 

Technical terms – every craft employs many specialized words for the sake of precise meaning for the cognoscenti, but which may not be clear to others.  “.270” means something to a hunter but nothing except evil mathematics to others.  Skillfully embed an explanation: “My sister enjoys hunting with her .270, which refers to her rifle and its calibre.”

 

Pronouns – “It.”  As with weak verbs, “it” is sometimes exactly the right word to use, but not often. 

 

Passive voice – the passive voice is to be avoided; you were told that by me.  Yes, there’s a bit of snarkiness (tho’ that’s a cliché’) in the preceding.

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